What is TAP and how did it get started?

When you are ready, feel warmly welcomed to share your story -- introduce yourself, let us know how you are feeling, what you've been through, and anything else that seems right. You are among friends. (Please remember not to identify your abuser.)

Abuse comes in many forms: verbal, emotional, spiritual, financial, physical violence, sexual violence, lying and intentional deception, name-calling, stalking, gas-lighting, word-salad, smear campaigns, love-bombing in the beginning stages, cutting one off from family and friends, infidelity, false pity stories, and sometimes death. There is cognitive dissonance, and the victim is confused. He may have lost all sources of support and feel trapped and hopeless, even driven to contemplating suicide. Many abusive relationships, especially with psychopathic types, follow a predictable trajectory from idealization to devaluation to discard, and by the time the discard phase sets in, the victim finds he has already been "replaced" by a new victim without his knowledge. There's also the "cycle of violence," where the perpetrator acts out abuse, promises to change, followed by short honeymoon period, and a return to the abuse and violence. Learn how to recognize the red flags of an abusive relationship, share your experiences, and get tips for how to survive.

Being the survivor of domestic abuse or domestic violence can seriously impact your well-being, your functioning in daily life, your physical health, and your emotional reactivity and responses.

You may find that you:
- Suffer from symptoms of PTSD.
- Seek relief from addictive and mind-altering substances.
- Become hypervigilant.
- Have a heightened sense of distrust of others.
- Question your sanity.
- Are overwhelmed by feelings or anger, grief, and despair.
- Blame yourself.
- Are unable to accomplish day-to-day tasks like you did before the relationship.
- Become suicidal.
- Many other symptoms.

Discuss your feelings here, and seek support, but remember that you are responsible for your personal safety. TAP does not and can not assure your personal safety.

By virtue of being designated female at birth, but recognizing some degree of inherent masculinity, whether FTM or somewhere else on the trans-masculine spectrum, we are uniquely vulnerable. Our gender status may be used against us in abuse. Or the life we dreamed of having after we transitioned may make us susceptible to those who could charm us for nefarious purposes and then abuse us. We do not quite fit in traditional paradigms and services for cisgendered women and men. Here is where we can speak about the experiences unique to us and support each other.

Have you been in an abusive relationship, now or in the past, whether gay or straight, whether dating or marriage, wither with a cisgendered partner or a trans* partner? Here is where you can talk about what you experienced.

If you have been in an abusive relationship and have children with your abuser, there are a plethora of issues that arise. The first rule of thumb in dealing with an abuser is "No Contact," but that's not always possible when you share custody with your abuser. This is a space to discuss child custody issues, and how to manage child-rearing with a partner who is or has been abusive.

When we are in an abusive relationship whether with a romantic partner, someone from our family or origin, in our workplace, or otherwise victimized, we may find we have been targeted by a psychopath. This space is for learning about, discussing, and sharing experiences related to psychopathy, sociopathy, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Anti-Social Personality Disorder, and other significantly disordered persons who lack conscience, deceive, and engage in purposeful harm.

Like all individuals, persons on the trans-masculine spectrum can experience abuse in their family of origin. It might be argued that we even experience higher or more severe levels of abuse. Whether by parents, siblings, close relatives, or trusted family friends, you can talk about your experiences here.

For allies, partners, family, and friends of trans-masculine abuse survivors. If you love someone who has been or is being abused or if you would like to support our cause, please post here. No perpetrators of abuse allowed.

All transgender people are particularly vulnerable to domestic violence and domestic abuse, including our transgender sisters. Although TAP will focus on support for transmasculine survivors, this board is a space for our transgender sisters to share their experiences and discuss issues relevant to them.

You can talk about anything here.

Moderator: Admin